heinselrunner's Running Shorts

3 Steps Forward, 2 Steps Back

2007-08-24T16:03:00.000-07:00

Physical therapy works. I've been suprised how quickly my ankle is recovering. Despite becoming very sore after my PT appointment Wednesday night, I walked 6 miles yesterday, swam 30 minutes, and ran in the pool for another 30 minutes. It feels good to move!

Today, though, my ankle is feeling a bit too achey. I'm trying not to panic, but I'm scared to death that I'll be facing Round 2 of surgery, crutches, PT, etc. And the next surgery will be far worse than Round 1. My PT did ultrasound on the particularly achey location, and it does seem to have settled down some, so hopefully if I just cool my heels for a couple of days, we'll be back on track. I know - MODERATION is the key. And I need to learn some patience.

Happily, we are leaving for Hawaii tomorrow, so I will definitely have the chance to relax and cool my heels. Both of our hotels have fabulous pools, so I'll be able to keep my swimming up. Maybe I'll even spring for a massage! I've been waiting all summer for this vacation, and I can't believe it's finally here. And, I don't have to bring crutches, which was a bit of a worry early on. So, things are looking up. It's up to me to keep the forward momentum on the recovery of my surgery going.

In a Funk

2007-08-10T19:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I've ditched the crutches, I've started PT, and am now walking about 2 miles a day. I should be thrilled to finally be back on my feet and on my way. Yet, today I'm down. It doesn't help that I've been fighting a terrible head cold all week, and haven't slept well. And, the aching in my ankle has me somewhat concerned that perhaps the surgery didn't work. But, I guess the real problem is that I'm realizing how long this road back to fitness is. After my first 2.5 mile walk, I developed a cramping in my right calf. Yesterday, on top of the pain in the calf and the ache in my ankle, I added a tightness in my hamstring. After a 2 mile walk?!?! Oh my God, how am I EVER going to get back to running 30, 50 or 100 miles? Normally, even when I'm 'out of shape', I can get thru a 50 miler, no problem. Yet a 2 mile walk leaves me hobbling? Ugh!

I just need to keep reminding myself that it could be so much worse, and for all the years I've been extremely active, this is my first significant injury. So, I really can't complain. Where's the Nyquil? Tomorrow's another day.

I Can Walk!

2007-08-01T23:12:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I had my second PT appointment today, and I am amazed at how much better my ankle is doing. I started my session by riding a stationary bike for 5 min to warm up the joint. Then I rolled my foot on a roller, stretched my toe joints, and my PT massaged the incision points. From there, I did some theraband work, and some very easy step downs (even the 2" step 'pinched' my right ankle - darn it!) After a light stretch I had ice and stim, and walked out of there a new woman. I can't believe how much less gimpy I am! Yes, there's still pain, but I'm working thru it now. With all I've been through, I have to admit I've had my share of doubts that I'd ever return to my lifestyle. Now, I'm hopeful that everything will heal up perfectly, and I'll be free to run, play soccer with my son (and with my team!), and do all the things I live for.

My nemesis is now going to be PATIENCE. Not my forte, but I know it's imperative to the long-term success of the procedure. If all goes well, I'll be running in 35 days. Patience is they key. I just need to remember I can't jump the gun on this, or everything I've suffered to date will have been in vain.

Goodbye Crutches!

2007-07-30T16:43:00.000-07:00

My doctor finally released me to start physical therapy and to kiss the crutches goodbye. Surprisingly, it's not been easy. I walk SOOOO slowly now and it's SOOOOO painful to bear 100% of my weight on my right foot. (Maybe if I hadn't gained so much weight it wouldn't be so bad!) My right leg seems to have forgotten how to walk, so I've got a pretty bad limp. I hadn't realized how comfortable I had become with the crutches. But, it's a relief to be on the way back to a normal life. I hope to be able to start running on Sept. 5, if my doctor agrees. I can't wait to run free again. I realize that's a long, long way off, but it will be worth it! Every ounce of my being is wanting to run. I hear it calling when I see somebody jogging down the street or as I drive by the hills I normally run. I miss feeling the breeze on my face as I run towards the ocean, and the sweat on my brow; that feeling I get once I'm finally warmed up and my body finds its rhythm. I miss my alone time, which I only seem to be able to take when I'm out running. So, for now, I'm putting my energy on rehab, so I can get back to running sooner.

I'm rehabbing at the [AS] Physical Therapy Center. So far, they've been measuring my range of motion and seeing what my limitations are. They've been very thorough and seem to understand not only physical limitations, but emotional frustrations as well. It's so nice to have someone who understands the desire to return to competition. I'll be going twice a week until my next dr. appt on Sept. 5, and you can bet I'll be diligently putting full effort into all of my exercises. For now, that means "writing" the alphabet with my right foot, bending my foot back at the ball, and practicing the "walk stance". Gee, learning to walk seemed so easy the first time around!

1000 Meters

2007-07-11T21:11:00.000-07:00

In a world where we typically talk in the 50 to 100 mile range, 1000 meters doesn't seem like much. But when you're injured and you've neither run for 2 months nor exercised at all for almost 4 weeks, 1000 meters is EVERYTHING. Today, for the first time in ages, I feel ALIVE again.

No, I'm not running yet. Running is still several weeks/months away. My 1000 meters was in a pool. I joined Los Caballeros today, since their pool is outdoors -- indoor pools gross me out -- and is open for lap swimming when my schedule, hopefully, will allow me to squeeze in a workout. Even tho I wasn't running, it felt GREAT to get my heart rate up and to have tired muscles. I haven't done any real swimming for 9 years, when I used to compete in long-distance ocean swimming and triathlons. That, and the fact that I'm still on crutches, caused my arms to fatigue quickly. Too quickly.

Technically, I'm still on restricted activity. The only thing my doctor has released me to do is to "crutch into a gym and do upper body weight lifting". UGH! My armpits, wrists and hands are so sore from the crutches, I can't bear to think of pumping iron with only my upper body. So I improvised a bit. I crutched myself poolside, slipped into the water with a well-taped ankle, and tried to propel myself across the 100 meter pool -- without drowning -- using only my arms. The first few strokes felt fantastic. "Just like riding a bike," I told myself. About 1/2 way across the pool in the first lap, I suddenly felt absolutely exhausted. "Oh my gawd!" I kept going, gasping for breath every other stroke, forcing my screaming arms to make another rotation, and trying to keep my body balanced with one foot taped into a rudder-like angle. Thank God I was there with mostly senior citizens, as they kindly ignored the spectacle of my attempt at swimming! I willed myself across the pool 10 times, truly elated to be EXERCISING.

I think I may have overdone it, tho. (Moderation has never been my forte.) I swam over to the ladder where my crutches were waiting, pulled myself out of the pool, and my arms seized. I could NOT work those stupid crutches. So, like a flamingo in heat, I hopped on my one good leg, crutches flailing, and beached myself on one of the poolside lounge chairs until my arms came back to life.

I showered up and gimped on back to my car, fully content with the effort I put forth. My arms, back, chest and shoulders are extremely sore. It feels fantastic to be an athlete again!

Musical Offices

2007-07-06T18:03:00.000-07:00

My office is moving - again. This will be my 3rd office location in the past year. When I first started working at [F] in the 80's, it was located in a building resembling a state penitentiary in Irvine at the 405 & Jamboree. It was a interesting office setup, and I truly enjoyed working there. In 1999 the company sold off the expansive plot of land in Irvine and built a campus in an undeveloped section of Aliso Viejo. While I was out on maternity leave the company moved to the new office, which basically tripled my commute. I was not a happy camper making that drive with my infant son every day! (Due to the long work hours [F] required and my desire to nurse my son during my lunchbreak, I couldn't put him in daycare closer to home.)

Last June, my project moved to a new office location on the outskirts of the UCIrvine campus. Not only did my commute get cut by 3/4, but I would no longer be forking over about $400/month in toll fees! It was like getting a second raise last year!

Now, this weekend, we're moving again. This time, we're headed to the Irvine Spectrum. Needless to say, once again, I'm not thrilled. Granted, I'm quite tired & crabby from trying to pack up all my files and office supplies while juggling crutches and balancing vicariously on one foot. But this last move has me seriously considering whether I can continue with my current job. As it is, I skip my lunch hour in an effort to be able to drop my son off at school and pick him up at a decent hour. Now, with the additional time spent fighting traffic on the 405, I'm not sure how this will work. Perhaps it's time for me to move on. I already have an offer from another firm, which is MUCH closer to home. The benefits package is not nearly as good, but I could make up for it in salary.

Isn't it intersting how a little detail such as office location can affect a career decision? We'll see how it goes this week. I'm not looking forward to fighting traffic on a daily basis again. What a bummer.

4th of July Tradition with a Twist

2007-07-04T17:46:00.000-07:00

Every year I run the Surf City 5K on the 4th of July with my son. I ran it with him in my womb, I ran it with him in a babyjogger, and I ran it with him 5 days after finishing Western States. This year, I couldn't run it. I tried to get strong enough to "crutch" alongside him, but I just couldn't do it. The risk to my ankle is just too high right now. Both Trevor and I were disappointed, but we decided the tradition must go on, and Trevor ran with Dad while I cheered from the sidelines. (Yes, it was an early wakeup call after my escapades the night prior!) It was a warm, muggy morning, but my boys finished strong and Trevor came home with another hard-earned medal. Happy 4th of July!

4-Oh!

2007-07-04T16:40:00.000-07:00

Yep, that's me. I'm now 40. How exactly did that happen? I sure don't feel 40! Since I'm a runner, there is a benefit: I'm now the youngster in a new age group. Too bad in ultrarunning the women's 40-49 age group tends to be one of the most competitive. Oh well, I won't get to test the waters of my new age group for a few months anyway.

Despite my desire NOT to celebrate my new decade with a birthday party, a group of my friends decided it needed to be acknowledged. We had a great time eating and drinking - and drinking some more - at Bucca di Beppo, then we sent the dads home to the kids, and the girls went to see chick flick "License to Wed". (Wait for the rental.) I didn't get home until almost 1 a.m. I survived. I'm 40 and I couldn't be happier.

The Tryout

2007-07-03T16:54:00.001-07:00

Okay, so this has absolutely nothing to do with running but, quite frankly, my life has nothing to do with running these days. So, I'm writing about other important matters in my life. Namely, my son and his latest passion: hockey.

Last night, my 8-year-old son Trevor tried out for his first roller hockey team. (Yes, he aspires to play ice hockey but it's easier to find pavement here than it is to find ice!) He did well and, more importantly, had a GREAT time doing so. Two of his best friends were out there with him and with any luck they'll end up on the same team.

Of course, the Anaheim Ducks' recent winning of the Stanley Cup has helped to foster this newfound interest in my son. Not only did the local team win, but Trevor became friends with one of the Ducks' sons and had the unique opportunity to touch Lord Stanley's Cup. Meeting Team Captains Scott and Rob Niedermayer certainly didn't hamper his interest! I gotta admit, I too have become a huge fan of the fast-moving sport. I noticed that there is a women's league out there too and would love to give the sport a first-hand try -- once my ankle is healed. (Oooh! Gotta love the positive thinking!)

We'll hear about my wanna-be future NHL star's team within the week. For today, I just have one message: DREAM BIG! Shouldn't we all have dreams as fabulous as those of 8-year-old boys?

My New Moniker: heinselgimp

2007-07-01T09:08:00.000-07:00

I'm injured. There, I said it. In 30+ years of playing soccer and running, this ranks as my worst injury. In fact, two doctors called it career-ending. (As if running and playing soccer is my 'career', but you get the jist!)

I had ankle surgery on June 14 to remove a torn 6mm x 4mm x 3mm chunk of cartilage from my talus. They cleaned up the edges of the tear (debridement), and poked holes into the surface of the talus (microfracture) to generate a blood supply (there was none) and - hopefully - secondary cartilage. This was the medial side. My surgeon also removed a substantial amount of scar tissue from the lateral side of the joint. (30+ years of rolling that ankle, but most notably on day 2 of the 2006 Western States Training weekend.). While he was in there, he also found a bone spur but decided to leave it alone. It hadn't been problematic, and many runners have them. I hope I'm not sorry about that someday.

So, now I'm in the wait-and-see mode - for 6 MONTHS!!!. I get to wait and see if my body generates the cartilage I need. I've been on crutches since the surgery, and the ONLY physical activity my doctor has released me to do is upper body weight lifting. With all the crutching I've been doing I don't have much strength left in my upper body to be able to do anything more! Next weekend, I get to start putting my right foot down to bear about 1/2 of my body weight. I'll be on crutches at least another 4 weeks, possibly longer.

Needless to say, I'm going insane! My last real workout was the Leona Divide 50M Run on April 21, where I felt the worst pain ever at the 10 mile mark. Foolishly, I continued on to the finish line instead of dropping. (After I finished I raced home to attend a party in South County, never really taking time to care for my screaming joint.) I managed to do a couple of shorter runs after that, but the pain was too bad.

So, I went to my GP, who realized I had a serious problem and ordered an MRI. Of all the things he was concerned about, the osteochondral defect of the talus was the worst case and could possibly end my running. The MRI came back and all my dr. could say was, "I'm so sorry." He thought, possibly, I could tolerate runs of up to 3 miles, but never more. My heart sank. I left his office and didn't return to work. I was way too upset.

I went to the foot/ankle dr. recommended by my GP, just to see if there was anything that could be done. I left her office in a knee-high walking boot. I was having trouble figuring out how a walking boot would resolve a tear in my cartilage, but the dr. wanted to stick with conservative treatment. I probed the running community for orthopedic surgeon recommendations and found a few who seemed to have more current technology up their sleeves. After much research and several phone conversations, I decided on a young but talented orthopedic surgeon in Santa Monica. Yes, it's a hike from my home in Huntington Beach, but worth it if it means I'll be able to run again. I'll gladly exchange a few hours in 405 rush hour traffic for endless hours running wild in the mountains.

Long story short - or should I say, long story long?! - my new OS had a plan. His plan made sense. Surgery is not something I take lightly but it was absolutely necessary. If nothing else, it's hope that I'm not done being an athlete. And, for now, I'm hanging my Nike running visor on that hope!!

My First Time

2007-02-26T11:45:00.000-08:00

Not THAT first time, but my first time as a blogger. For a private person like me, this seems to be an odd thing to do, but I'm hoping I can get my running life in order by doing this. We'll see. If nothing else, it'll be an interesting experiment.